....I think I might have one. The serious way I look at the world translates to my face, and for the past, oh, two years, I've felt very seriously about the world around me. I've looked at it with concern, and worry, and that translates to my skin.
You know when you put on mascara, or put in or take out your contact lenses, there is an involuntary fish-mouth that happens? In order to mess around with your eyes, your eyebrows shoot up and your mouth gapes in a weird way.
I hated that, and so I trained myself not to do it. It wasn't hard, retraining my face and keeping my damn mouth shut. Now, it's not even an effort. I just shut my mouth and get on with my makeup.
I say this not to talk about how I look, but rather to talk about how the expression on your face is often an unconscious reflection or involuntary creation of your internal mood. They say if you smile, your brain will begin to feel happy because smiling is associated with happiness. They also say that frowning too much will give you frown lines, which is not something I'm actually worried about because I don't care, but who wants to be the person scowling all the time?
Anyway. Resting bitch face.
I read a book recently, more and more books recently, that were... for lack of a better word, cheap. Quick, satisfying thrills, things that I could read in an afternoon or two, things that I tore through with little regard for how they stood in the Great Hierarchy of Books. I'm reading Divergent right now because I plan on going to see the next movie soon, and I'd like to read the books first... or maybe see the movie first, I don't actually mind doing it the other way around when I've already spoiled the first book with the movie.
Anyway.
These cheap books, these cheap thrills, are legitimate thrills. I don't think they're "cheap" in a bad way, and I don't feel bad for reading them. I enjoy them a lot, and I began to wonder what I looked like when I read them. Because the way I've been feeling lately, ever since my birthday a week ago, has been different. Lighter. I feel like I let go of some troubles and cares that had been weighing on me for a long time. I don't think that is the cause of my new reading habits, but I think that allowing myself more and more small, so-called "guilty" pleasures is one side effect of having a lighter soul.
I thought about training my face to be lighter. Not to have a scowl, or that tiny worry frown stuck in the center of my forehead all the time. What does a face say about a feeling? Plenty, I'm sure. A trained face can say or conceal anything, with control.
Spring is here, finally. I'm happy these days, and I want to reflect that.
